Life is the biggest fucker out there. It will piss on you when your down and kick you in the balls when your standing. It will tear apart your marriage and everything you have. What we don't realize as we are busy trying to make ends meet in the race of buying shit we don't need is that in any marriage the most important aspect is you and your partner. If you and your partner are not happy then everything else is fucked. As parents we are the number 1 role model, having the most influence in our children's lives. If mom and dad suck at being man and wife then how are they going to be when they grow up. Remember that life will attempt to get in your way so you have reconnect with your partner when you realize you have drifted apart. Think of a marriage as two planets that are in geosynchronous orbit with each other. Without proper maintenance this orbit gets F.U.B.A.R.. When things get F.U.B.A.R.ed bad shit happens.
Sex is the number 1 reason your marriage is out of sync. Sex is the foundation of all marriages in this day and age. Where people think getting married is the equivalent of "going steady". Shake that up with long hours at work, kids, bills, debt and a whole bunch of other shit you wind up with a lot of exhausted nights wondering how your going to get through the next day. Sex is the answer! It's the number one indicator if your marriage is going down the crapper and it's time to reconnect.
But there is never enough time. Bullshit! That is an excuse there is always time. I'm not attracted to my partner. Well that sucks, might be why your not getting any. We don't have anything in common anymore. We don't, We don't We don't... are all excuses as to why your not bumping uglies, screaming "oh, God, Ala, Jehovah, Buddha, etc" or "YES! Oh Yes!" We live in an "I can't" society, no longer a "We Can" America. Everyday there are opportunities to do the nasty. The problem is will she let you?
So you have all these excuses, yet you don't want your marriage to end. Well the biggest thing you have to do is reconnect with your partner. This is a big concept with a great deal of many small parts. This requires work and effort on your part. But will result in a great deal of sex if your not a prick.
Number one reason sex is taken off the table by women is because they expect things you don't give them anymore. Most women have told you in their top secret language we have no fucking clue how to read. And because we haven't decoded their wants: Guess what, "NO MORE DOING THE NASTY". Which causes the spiral of a loveless marriage ending with the divorce after all the kids leave. Is it our fault we don't know the language of crazy? That's debatable. What isn't is taking our partners for granted, not doing anything nice for them. Yes, we got married, they won and wenare now whipped. We fight against this caging by not doing the things we are told to by our jailers. We wait to be nagged and nagged before theyir throwing things. Well our defiance to our imprisonment is us rallying against authority, attempting to get our way without having to do anything. Men I learned this is just a slow way in killing ourselves. I find that doing what is necessary without being told gives me a lot less bitching and a lot more sexy presents. I'm well trained but I'm also well rewarded.
Reconnecting means doing things you don't have to, without the expectation of something in return. "What the hell?". Remember the end goal, Porn Sex. Just because you took the trash out last week without being told doesn't mean your going to get a reward. Women don't understand that if they want us to do things we need positive reinforcement. We have to train them to do this. And taking out the trash regularly doesn't deserve a treat in their irrational world. For a reward it means you do all your chores without being told, and do the ones she hates the most for at least a month. Once this month is over you can't drop her chores like a bad habit you have to drop one a week or so so it's not obvious. We don't want her expecting you took over her chores. Women have a problem with selective memory disease. They only remember the shit you did bad, because you don't do enough good to counteract the bad. Why give them a reason to talk shit. This is the first small step in reconnecting. The trick is to balance it without overdoing it. If you do something long enough women come to expect it. And as Chris Rock said, women do not go backwards. Take the kids once a month on an all day trip, leaving a note and a flower to relax and take the day to do nothing (This takes some skill as you have to get everything prepped before you leave and with young kids this is a hurricane rapped in a tornado.) Doing these small things similar to this randomly sets the tone letting your partner know you want to get rid of the kids for a weekend. But it also signals to a woman that you care and you appreciate them (I don't know why but that's what it means). Which wants to spend the weekend with you.
When this weekend happens don't make it about sex. Make it about you and your partner. Making it about "having" a good time implies sex later. But you aren't home free and you have to continue to set the tone. Remember your training her to reward you with all your hard work. Don't screw it up.
Make sure the week before your weekend: talk/text, clearly telling each other what you want out of the weekend. If you say naked porn action right off the bat your fucked and I can't help you because your a dumb ass. Make sure you include a TV series you both can tolerate or movies. Things that keep you at home or in a hotel room. Having a weekend without kids, means you need to decompress. If your still like to go out drinking make sure this option is put in on your recovery day. Your partner wants to spend time with you. Having hours of TV gives them that and you don't even have to talk. Having a weekend on the couch catching up on Game of Thrones or Mike and
Molly with a few glasses of wine/bear/liquor gives you better odds of
some naked time.
Make sure a dinner is in there as well. For some reason women have this notion they have to be wine and dinned. So to reconnect we have to do this. Now it doesn't have to be a flashy, break the bank kinda thing. Your trip can be to the grocery store for dinner ingredients, the redbox for movies. The key is to sleep in and spend all your time together. If your relationship is on tenuous ground, most of the time you will have to talk about things that are not personal. Politics, food, What would be a cool place to visit, etc. This is a reconnection not an inquisition unless you want a full out should we stay together weekend. For most of us life just got in the way and we forgot about keeping each other in orbit.
Now that you have your weekend and life comes back to invade your world you still need to do the things you did before to keep that reconnection alive and healthy. Which means buying a bunch of roses randomly every few months to say I love you. Doing your chores without being told (this will be the hardest but is also the most important). Remember begging for sex is beneath us. Our partners should want to fornicate with us and by doing the small things right without fuss we train them to give us what we want: SEX.
Remember this if nothing else: Women gauge a man's love for them by what is done for them. Men gauge a woman's love for them by how much dirty sex they get.
-Brought to you by RudestDad
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